Module 1, Topic 1
In Progress

The myth of love

Love Coach October 5, 2021

Hey man, what is love, dating, or attraction? What is your opinion about love? What do you think love is? What is your perception of love, and how did you form that perception so far?

Perhaps you are single and looking for your special woman. Or you have a girlfriend and experiencing the love and want to get better at the love life. In either of the cases, you must be doing many things to get a girlfriend or a better lover, your girlfriend.

But have you ever asked yourself what exactly does love mean between a couple (in the context of male-female dynamics)? Have you ever asked what exactly does love mean to you? How much does love help to become a better person vs. drag you down? Is love a need, a want, a desire, or a must in life? And what is the drama that you are watching around the world?

Perhaps you are wondering what I am going to tell you about this. Well! I am going to teach you my most important insights that help you to lead your love life and women as you read this book further.

Before that, let us first understand some conventional notions that we usually listen to in society. The sad part is these notions are so strong that we believe them as correct at the subconscious level.
• Love is divine
• Love is unique
• Love is life beautiful
• Love happens once in a lifetime
• There is only one person that was born for you, and you will find her or him when the right time comes
• When you are in love, tell the feeling to the women you are in love within a few minutes of interacting with her
• Be open and express your feelings with her
• You find true love rarely
• Die for true love
• If you love a woman indeed, you will even ready to die for her
• Love is important more than your life
• The attraction is temporary, and love is forever
• You are unfortunate if a woman does not love you
• If you are in love, you have miraculous power, and you can do wonders in the world.
Wow! Great Notions. My question is—how many of these beliefs did help you to get the woman you want. Did these beliefs help you to become a better person in some way? These idealistic beliefs are one of the key reasons why most men fail with women.

I learned the fact in a hard way about these beliefs from my own experience and experiences of others whom I know. But the reality is often unnoticed by your naked eye and unknown to your conscious mind. You cannot see the truth as society influences you continuously. The result—you struggle for very things that should be naturally available to you.

Sometimes, you need a new guru who pushes you towards the right path that your naked eye and conscious mind cannot see.
Today, wherever you are, you are no different from the reference group or environment you belong to.

MY TAKE:
Love, dating, attraction, or marriage is a different form of the human mating process. You may call the process love, dating, a formal marriage, or just casual sex.

All these are various ways to reach a means of the human mating process. You are at this very phase of your life and are ready for mating.

You mate with your opposite sex and reproduce, and your genes survive and pass onto the next generation. That is the deal and the very purpose of love or dating or marriage.

Apart from that reproductive process, you will also get happiness & pleasure physically, mentally, and emotionally while you love or date or mate with your partner.

We all know that our human species started our journey some thousands of years ago. According to Christian mythology, the human species began with only two people, a man and a woman, Adam and Eve, only two on the earth. Then, the mating process was automatic to them and could have happened naturally. Hence, neither Adam nor Eve might have struggled to understand the process, as they were only two members on the earth.

However, today you and I live among approx — 8 billion people on this earth. Over thousands of years, our human evolutions have progressed massively.

Inventions and innovations that helped us lead a comfortable life. During the process, we had to consume massive information that has a tremendous influence on the way we live, behave, or follow specific belief systems.

Today, wherever you are, you are no different from the reference group or environment you were brought up.

For instance, look at the lifecycle of a human being. Each human being goes through the same phases in his or her life cycle: After a man born, he would bring up, during the process gets educated, gets a job or might not go to a college or does laborious tasks or do some work. Then, he gets married to a woman he loves or arranged by his family. Then, he has children, bring them up, send them to school or college, and make them independent adults and get them married. Then, he sees their grandchildren and their progress. Once the man reaches his old age, his life expires, and the human being cycle ends.

Every man goes through these same phases in his life. But the ways each man chooses to reach those depends on the reference group or environment that he belongs to.

Irrespective of a man’s status, he goes through all these phases in his life — for instance, a millionaire and daily wage worker. A man does not need to be a millionaire to go through these phases. Even a regular wage worker also goes through these phases in his life.
The secret to a better life is to design the phases of our lives in a way we want and live a better and happy life with the women we want.
Why am I telling this philosophy? “Could a daily wage worker ever be happy in his life if he starts comparing himself with a millionaire?”

He can never be happy. Sadly, that is what society conditioned us to do in our life. Our environment continuously pushes us to compare ourselves with others who have more things.
A man does not have to be a millionaire to go through all the phases in his life. He does not need money to attract a woman. A man—himself—is enough to attract a woman.
The society sets the unimportant, meaningless targets and pushes us to chase them continuously. For instance, you believe that looks and money are essential in attracting a woman. As a result, you think that studying at a corporate college and getting a good job is necessary to attract a woman you want.

What you need, however, is to understand a woman’s mind to attract her, not a college degree in computers.

Having a computer degree with a good income can make you a better provider to a woman. But not guarantee that you will attract her.

But society conditioned you to chase things that are not important to you because society has its benefits.

For instance:
• A Gym coach convinces you that a six-pack physique will get a woman you want. But the reality is you will get better health, not a woman.
• A clothes manufacturer convinces you that wearing his clothes will get you a woman. The clothes, however, only makes you look better.
• A car manufacturer convinces you that having their car will get you a woman, likewise a bike manufacturer. Role models/celebrities who use these brands made us believe that these are necessary for attracting girls.
• There are no better examples than Perfume Ads. They show as if using their perfume will get you all the women. You know what I am talking about.
Each time you are convinced, they win in terms of purchase and money. All of them have some or other benefits by making us believe wrong things or delay our success with women.

Imagine, if you believe that none of the products you use in day-to-day life can help you to get a woman, how difficult it will be for all other people in society to convince you.

If you want to become successful with women, you must stop believing this drama (consumerism).
If you want your life to be exciting and spiced up, come out of that comfort zone and lead your love. –Sam